Which brings me to something I’d like to admit regarding my journey in Aikido up to this point.
I love this dojo; not so much for the people or the art itself, but the journey that has happened to me on a personally and emotional basis since 2008. Back in that year, I would not have imagined who I would be this year.
Back in that year, I was lost. I had just came back from Los Angeles after a humiliating firing from a teller position at a bank there. Dazed and confused, I had not known why I had been released – other than the fact that I had been! Stumbling to and from here and LA, I (after some furious internal debating) finally moved back home with my tail tucked between my legs and a sense of shame coming back home – a place where I had wanted to leave behind in the first place (more on that later).
I started training at a local community college until I had heard about my Sensei’s dojo. From a shodan of his, I heard of how he was a very “honest” sensei and had the reputation of leaving “no stone unturned” when it comes to critiquing his students.
Code word for he’ll physically let you know that you’ve made a mistake, like letting his punches hit you if you are to stand there (more on this in a future post).
That was August of 2008. In February of 2009 the realization came to me that “Aikido will change my life”.
I don’t know that extent of that, but so far it’s been good. I’m still without a “real” job, or a career for that matter and I’m still living with my parents (a complicated risky decision back in 2008).
I’m come to call these past 5 years as my “therapy” stage where the dojo was the place where I had learned about myself (still am!) in good company.
So when this test comes and goes, I will go onto the next stage in my life.