A mom was visiting her son during the after school time. Now keep in mind her son was one of the trouble makers of my class – a spoiled brat that made my sister looked like a goody two shoes.
Mind you, we’ve (my boss and I) have spoken to her a few times about the behavior of her son in my presence. I’ve also spoken to some of the 5th grade teachers regarding him and the impression I got was that this particular mother was a “spacey” and unreliable one regarding keeping her child accountable for his homework and behavior.
Little did I realize how little accountability she had of her son until this particular day.
As I was standing there in front of the library (where we usually met), I saw that she had a small audience around her and her son – lets called him Max. At this time I had already put in my two weeks and not wanted to stir up more drama than needed I allowed Max and the rest of his compadres to do what they wished during homework (instead of doing homework).
Anyway, while removing myself from the small group of
11th grade 5th grade boys around the mom, I started observing their interactions out of the corner of my eye.
Now remember, I’m a feeler type – I pay attention to the emotional exchange rather than the actual words exchanged.
Being this, I saw – and felt – how instead of being an authoritative/leader figure she was looking as her child with…I don’t know how to say it? Can-do-no-wrong attitude? It’s hard to describe, but what I felt was the relationship one would see from a parent who had been spoiling their child(ten) for the majority of their lives.
During the conversation they were talking about the lady bugs that Max had caught. This was with 4 other boys in the group. I’ve forgotten what was discussed long ago, but I distinctly remember how all 5 boys were talking as if they were 20 year olds and the moms was just being a doormat/ass kisser/allower.
Honestly, it as gross – and I say that with the conviction of someone who was spoiled themselves. Years of martial arts training has reverse my attitude regarding the adult-child dynamic. I believe that adults who are flawed are no better than flawed children, but Max’s mother was one who’d take the cake for perpetuating her son’s lack of discipline, respect, common sense, and lack of boundaries.
I was actually cringing as I was listening in on their conversations – and I’m still cringing now.